Wingnuttery: Savour the flavour of fresh fetus!

The teabaggers' batshit insanity offers hours of fun for those of us who reside in a little place called "reality". Yea, the refusal of Democratic voters to stop whining and get up off their asses and vote in 2010 ensured the ascension of extremist nutjobs to state and national offices where they can wreck havoc on the rights of labour, women, gays  and sell off the national infrastructure to the highest bidder. Despite all the horribleness, every once in a while the whackjobs create a piece of legislation that is completely brilliant in its lunacy. I'm talking comedy gold!

First off, New Hampshire!

Apparently the Constitutions of the state of New Hampshire AND the United States are no longer sufficient in the creation of law:

"House Bill 1580 is the product of such a brainstorming session this summer between three freshman House Republicans: Bob Kingsbury of Laconia, Tim Twombly of Nashua and Lucien Vita of Middleton. The eyebrow-raiser, set to be introduced when the Legislature reconvenes next month, requires legislation to find its origin in an English document crafted in 1215.

'All members of the general court proposing bills and resolutions addressing individual rights or liberties shall include a direct quote from the Magna Carta which sets forth the article from which the individual right or liberty is derived,' is the bill's one sentence."

 I'll just let Renegade Cornpone's East Coast correspondent, Stephen Colbert, explain it for you:

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I didn't think it could get any better than that. However, I forgot about Oklahoma.

Yesterday, it was reported that a Republican from Oklahoma is planning to introduce a bill that would ban the use of human fetuses in food.

Yea, you read that correctly. Human fetuses in food.

State Senator Ralph Shortey argues “there is a potential that there are companies that are using aborted human babies in their research and development of basically enhancing flavor for artificial flavors.”

Wait! There's more!:

"Though he has allowed that he is not aware of this occurring in Oklahoma, or anywhere for that matter, Shortey cited research he did on the internet that claimed that some companies use embryonic stem cells to help develop artificial flavoring. 'It would be a public relations nightmare for a company to use' aborted human fetuses for R&D, Shortey told KRMG Radio, so when asked they usually say something like 'we strive to do things ethically.'

 'I’m not entirely sure if there are any' companies doing this, he continued. 'But the fact is that there is a potential that there are companies that are using aborted human babies in their research and development of basically enhancing flavor for artificial flavors. And if that is happening — because it is a possibility — and if it’s happening then I just don’t think it should even be an option for a company.'

[...]

U.S. Food and Drug Administration spokeswoman Pat El-Hinnawy told the Associated Press that the 'FDA is not aware of this particular concern.' And Tony Lauinger, the executive director of Oklahomans for Life, a pro-life group that has pushed anti-abortion laws in the state, said “I don’t know anything about that.'"

Well, I can say that I'm relieved to see Sen. Shortey addressing the biggest non-existing threat in America today.